An Unspoken Dream (Kansas Crossroads Book 13) Read online

  “I . . . well, I wanted to speak with you for a moment and tell you how glad I am about your marriage. I’m sure Timothy is taking good care of you.”

  “Grace did pass along your message,” Nancy Ann replied. A dark-haired girl took the basket of wet laundry, carried it over to the line, and gave it to Grace. A quick glance around told him that their conversation was being carefully monitored by all the other waitresses. That certainly wasn’t awkward.

  “Well, I’m glad of it,” he said. He cast around in his mind for something else to say, but there didn’t seem to be anything. “I’ll see you later.”

  He gathered up his bags, went inside, and climbed the stairs to the second floor. How was he supposed to live down his past behavior if he couldn’t even manage to hold a conversation with one of the people he’d hoped to reconcile with?

  ***

  “Gilbert!” A tall young man working in a garden plot a yard’s length ahead tossed aside his rake and came to the gate. “What brings you here?”

  “Hello, Stephen,” Gilbert replied, shaking his brother’s hand in greeting. “It’s been a little while since I was here—thought I was due for a visit.”

  “You’re always welcome.” Stephen unlatched the gate and held it wide. “Come in. Are you staying with us?”

  “I booked a room at the Brody.” Gilbert looked around the tidy little yard. “This is a pleasant place you have here.”

  “It’s a bit smaller than we ultimately want, but it’s perfect for us just starting out. Come up to the porch and have some cool water.”

  “You could certainly use some,” Gilbert replied, looking at his brother’s damp shirt and forehead.

  Stephen laughed. “Yes, I could. We’re hoping to get our garden put in by early next week, but this ground is proving harder to work with than I thought it would be.”

  Gilbert lowered himself onto one of the chairs on the porch and accepted the glass of water Stephen handed him. “Maybe I could be of some help.”

  “You? Getting yourself dirty?” Stephen laughed again. “I can’t imagine it.”

  “Well, I’d say it’s about time I learned.” Gilbert leaned back and looked at his brother. Stephen seemed happy here. Yes, he was covered in dirt and could use a bath, but he seemed content, and Gilbert suddenly found himself jealous. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been content. He’d always felt restless, dissatisfied, wanting to try this thing or that to fulfill him. Nothing ever had.

  Stephen finished off his water and then crossed one ankle over the opposite knee. “So, what really brings you out? There’s something on your mind.”

  “You’re right. I do have something to discuss with you.” Gilbert motioned over toward the railroad tracks. They weren’t visible from Stephen’s house, nor was the Brody, but that didn’t matter so much. “Do you know what you have right here in Topeka?”

  “That’s a pretty broad question,” Stephen replied. “Are we talking about my home, my wife, my job—there’s a lot to choose from.”

  “Yes, and all of that’s wonderful, but I mean the railroad, and the fact that Topeka is the grand jumping-off point for the rest of the nation. I’ve had an idea, Stephen, and I want to bring you in on it.”

  Stephen raised an eyebrow. “I always get nervous when you say you’ve had an idea. It’s generally costly, and almost always foolish.”

  “Ah, not this time. Well, it’s costly, but it’s not foolish. I want to start a shipping company.”

  “A shipping company?”

  “That’s right.”

  Stephen shook his head. “You do remember, don’t you, that we grew up working with Father in a shipping company? This isn’t something new.”

  “It’s new because it would be the two of us running it, and we’d do it here in Topeka instead of in Denver.” Gilbert leaned forward as he warmed to his subject. “We take what we learned working for Father and we use it to create our own empire. And, of course, we do everything legally.”

  “Yes, that would be a plus.” Stephen chuckled. “I don’t know, Gil. I thought we were both eager to be out from under Father’s thumb and to be doing something different with our lives.”

  “Well, that was the plan, but I’ve discovered something.” Gilbert shook his head. He didn’t like making admissions of weakness, but this was his brother he was talking to, and he wouldn’t be able to hide anything for long anyway. “I only have a few marketable skills, and if I’m going to make anything of myself in this world, I’ll need to fall back on what I know.”

  “I don’t think you give yourself enough credit,” Stephen protested, but Gilbert held up a hand.

  “Believe me, I’m speaking the truth. Everything I’ve tried over the last several months has been a dismal failure. I wish I had other options, but I really don’t.”

  Stephen toyed with a string that was coming loose from the hem of his work shirt. “We make an adequate living, but it’s true that my job here hasn’t provided many opportunities for growth or excitement. And I don’t want Sarah to have to be at the Brody forever—that kind of cooking is hard work, and if we start a family, it would be best for her health to stay home.”

  “So you’ll think about it?” Gilbert felt hope flicker in his chest.

  “I’ll think about it. I have a great many questions, though. First off, how do you plan to get customers?”

  Gilbert chuckled. “That might be one of the easy parts. I have a list of all Father’s old customers, and we can write to them.”

  “You can’t be serious. They’re all furious with Father for skimming money off the top.”

  “Yes, but they aren’t furious with us. We were the innocents in this, remember? We write to these men, tell them that we’re eager to rebuild our lives, and we invite them to give us a chance to redeem our good names.”

  “You’ve got some scheming bones in your body still, haven’t you?” Stephen shook his head.

  “What? Nothing I said wasn’t true. I’m just adding to it a little bit.”

  “We can write to them, but we will not be playing on their sympathies. That’s hardly ethical.”

  Gilbert sighed. “You always were the ethical one in the family. All right, I’ll compose a letter, and you’ll get to read it before I send it. Is that fair?”

  “That’s very fair. And now, what about an office?”

  “An office. Yes, we will need one of those, won’t we?”

  “It’s always helpful for a business to have an office.” Stephen laughed. “I tell you what, brother. Think things over just a little bit more, and I’ll come to the hotel for dinner tomorrow night. I was going to invite you to eat here, but then I realized, it’s hardly kind of me to ask my wife to come home and cook for company when she’s already made a giant meal at the Brody, and you wouldn’t want to eat anything I made. We’ll eat, you’ll share your new ideas, and then we can make a decision.”

  “That sounds like a plan.” Gilbert came to his feet. “I think I’ll walk around town a bit and see if there are any available buildings that would suit. I’ll also stop in at the bank and inquire about loans.”

  “The bank?”

  “Yes. Is something wrong with the bank?”

  Stephen chuckled again. “Oh, I just thought you’d be a little wary of that place. After all, Nancy Ann did marry one of the tellers. Do you want me to inquire?”

  Gilbert shook his head. “It seems that I’m to be confronted by my past life no matter what I do. I’ll go in there anyway. If I’m not man enough to conduct my own business, well, I’m not much of a man.”

  “There’s the spirit.” Stephen clapped him on the shoulder. “I’ll see you tomorrow night. Hopefully, I’ll be able to report that I got the garden plot all cleared out.”

  “I’ll hold you to that,” Gilbert said. “Accountability is good for the soul.”

  Chapter Three

  Grace carried the last of the dinner plates into the kitchen, then grabbed a dish towel and began drying
for Nora, who was falling a little behind. The girl still looked pale. Not that Grace was surprised by that.

  “We’ll need to tell the other girls soon,” Grace said quietly.

  “I know. I won’t be able to hide it much longer,” Nora replied. Her hands grew still in the water. “They’ll hate me.”

  “They’re not going to hate you. They’ll all react exactly as Mr. Brody did—with compassion. And if anyone does have an issue with it, they’ll be the ones to leave, not you.”

  Nora nodded. “Will you help me? With talking to them, I mean.”

  “Of course I will.”

  “How about when we’re done here? I might as well get it over with.”

  “I think that’s a good idea.” Grace reached out and put her hand on Nora’s shoulder. “Everything’s going to be all right.”

  After the dishes were done, Grace asked Posy and Georgia to sweep the dining room, and she put fresh cloths on all the tables. Sarah and Ruth had already begun the bread for the next day. It was a never-ending routine, but there was comfort in knowing what to expect.

  “Sarah, Nancy Ann, I know your husbands are at home waiting for you, but could you stay for a few minutes? There’s something important that we need to talk about,” Grace said, wishing once again that Giselle was there to take charge instead of her. Once all the girls had gathered in the dining room, Grace looked down the hall to make sure there weren’t any guests wandering around where they might be able to overhear, and then she nodded at Nora.

  Nora glanced around at the girls who had assembled and clasped her hands in front of her. “I need . . . I need to tell you all something. I’ve already told the Brodys and Grace, and you should know too . . . it’s just hard.”

  “What’s the matter, Nora?” Carrie asked, her eyes already showing sympathy.

  “I . . . I’m expecting.”

  Grace didn’t hear a single sound, but she saw every pair of eyes widen. “Something terrible happened to her, and she’s come to us for help and understanding,” she interjected. “Mr. Brody has taken her in, and we can show her our support as well.”

  “Of course,” Ruth said, wrapping an arm around Nora’s shoulders. “Whatever you need.”

  “I can sew baby clothes,” Nancy Ann said. “You have no idea how many baby clothes I’ve made in my life, what with all my little brothers and sisters.”

  “I’m horrible with babies, but I can help with its laundry,” Carrie chimed in.

  “And I’m rather excellent with babies,” Sarah said. “You’ve come to the right place, Nora. And I trust Mr. Brody is going to teach you how to shoot.”

  “My first lesson is tomorrow,” Nora said. She grabbed her handkerchief and wiped her eyes. “Thank you, everyone. You’re being so kind.”

  “Of course,” Ruth said. “That’s the Brody way.”

  Grace looked around at the group and felt her heart expand. These girls, this hotel—it was almost magical how loved and secure she felt here.

  “Oh, and one more thing,” Nora said. “Elizabeth thinks it’s best if we tell people I’m a widow. That would be better than . . . well, than the truth.”

  “Well, you’re going to need a story, then.” Carrie leaned forward. “What will you name him?”

  “Name him?” Nora looked confused.

  “Yes! Your husband.”

  “Um . . .” Nora looked down and blushed. “When I was a little girl, I liked a boy at school. His name was Colin.”

  “Perfect!” Carrie looked very pleased with this idea. “And his last name?”

  “Let’s keep using my last name. I don’t want this to become any more confusing than it already is.”

  “Colin Denning,” Posy said, a wistful look on her face. “That’s a wonderful name. What did he look like?”

  “The real Colin had blond hair and blue eyes. And he was taller than the other boys.” Nora thought for a minute. “And he had a slight gap between his two front teeth. Just a little one.”

  “Now for the biggest question. How did he die?” Sarah asked, and the girls grew still. Grace could tell they were all trying to think something up.

  “He was gored by a bull?”

  “Shot during a bank robbery?”

  “Fell off a cliff?”

  “Leprosy?”

  “Died in a mining accident?”

  “All his teeth fell out, and he starved to death?”

  “Drowned while panning for gold?”

  The suggestions started flowing so thick and fast, Grace wasn’t even sure who had said what. Nora laughed, holding up both hands.

  “I think you’re having a little too much fun killing off my pretend husband,” she said. “Maybe something simple so there won’t be a lot of follow-up questions.”

  “A sudden fever?” Grace replied.

  “That will work. Thank you, everyone. I feel better than I have in a couple of months.” Nora gave each girl a quick hug, and then they all went their separate ways—Sarah and Nancy Ann to go home to their husbands, the rest of the girls upstairs, and Grace to go outside and sit on the porch for a little while. It had grown warm in the hotel, and the cool evening breeze was just what she needed.

  She stepped to the edge of the porch and lifted her arms and face to the sky, welcoming the night and letting the air lift the tendrils of hair off her face and neck. Then she took a seat on one of the rocking chairs near the porch steps, startling when she heard a voice.

  “Good evening, Grace.”

  She looked down the length of the porch to see Gilbert Howard sitting on a chair nearly at the end. “Oh, hello. I didn’t know anyone was out here.” He must think she’d lost her mind, watching her little evening ritual.

  “It’s a very pleasant evening. I didn’t want to waste it by being inside.” He sounded neutral—maybe he hadn’t noticed anything unusual.

  “And are you enjoying your stay so far? Finding everything you need?”

  “I am, thank you.”

  Grace nodded, then fell silent. She couldn’t think of anything else to say. Truth be told, his presence felt like an intrusion. All she wanted was some quiet after the busy day, and her mind was still on Nora’s situation.

  “I wonder if I could ask you a question.”

  “I believe you just did, Mr. Howard.”

  He laughed. “You’re right—I did. And please, call me Gilbert. May I ask you another question? Or perhaps two, so we don’t go around in circles all night?”

  She smiled and shook her head. There would be no getting out of this conversation, apparently. “What would you like to ask?”

  Gilbert stood up and moved to a chair closer to hers. She supposed that was easiest for the sake of talking to each other, but it was pretty inconvenient when she wanted to make a quick escape. After he was settled again, he said, “You and Nancy Ann seem to be good friends.”

  “Yes, I’d say we are.”

  “And you’re friends with Sarah, too.”

  “That’s right.”

  He let out a puff of air. “And women like to share things with each other . . .”

  “If you’re asking if every girl in this hotel has heard all your secrets, the answer would be yes.” She hoped he could hear the humor in her voice. “It’s just how we are, Gilbert—nothing personal.”

  “I expected that, and I even deserve it—if I can’t behave myself, every female in the world should be warned. But there is a problem, and I don’t know how to fix it.”

  “Oh? What’s that?” She was impressed that he could admit how badly he’d acted. That took some courage and self-reflection.

  “Now that I’ve realized this about myself and want to be different, I don’t know how to make amends. Everyone relies on their memories of me or what they’ve heard instead of the man I am today.”

  Grace nodded. “That is difficult, and I can’t say that I have an easy answer.”

  “At this point, I’ll take whatever answers I can get. I tried speaking to Nancy Ann earlie
r and was completely shut out, and to be honest, I’m scared to say hello to Sarah. She’s . . . well, to continue being honest, she’s tougher than I am.”

  Grace laughed right out loud at both his words and his rueful tone of voice. “She is tough, but she’s also tender. I think she’d be willing to move past your history together, especially now that you’re related. It doesn’t make sense to hold on to old grudges.”

  “This is exactly what I’m saying. We should all just let it go, embrace the new, stop hating Gilbert . . .”

  She shook her head, amused. “Just what brought about this sudden desire to make amends? Did you have to face your mortality in some gruesome way?”

  “No, but the truth isn’t so terribly far off from that.” He paused, and Grace wondered if he was going to continue. “The people in Denver have been very unkind about my father,” he said at last. “He embezzled some money from the shipping company he ran, and he’s currently in jail. To hear people talk, you’d think he committed murder and burned down a church and kicked a puppy. They just can’t stop talking about him and his misdeeds. It’s made my mother’s life miserable, but he has no way to make it up to anyone while he’s locked away.”

  “And you don’t want that to be you someday,” Grace surmised.

  “Exactly. I don’t want anyone to have cause to hate me or carry a grievance. It hurts my pride to admit that I’ve been wrong so often, but sometimes pride needs to be shown a thing or two.”

  Grace nodded. “I must say, this conversation isn’t going at all how I’d expected.”

  “Oh? What did you expect?”

  “I’m not sure, but it wasn’t something so open and revealing. This is quite a pleasant surprise.”

  “I’m glad you’re not offended by this side of me, Miss McAllister. Now if I can only get Nancy Ann and Sarah to feel as you do . . .”

  “They’re both fair women. I believe they’ll come around. I have to say, though, that I’d tread very softly. Show them you’ve changed rather than telling them.”