Pet Peeves Read online

  Pet Peeves

  River’s End Ranch Book Fifty-Two

  by Amelia C. Adams

  With thanks to my beta readers—Amy, Dorothy, George, Joseph, Mary, Meisje, Renee, and Shelby.

  Cover design by Erin Dameron-Hill

  Table of Contents:

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Epilogue

  About the Author and Links

  Chapter One

  Jamal Jenkins finished pounding in the last nail on the new goat corral and then grabbed the railing and shook it, hoping that this time, it would remain secure. Every batch of goats brought some new challenges along with it, but he’d never counted on Billy, the ranch’s newest little kid, who might just as well have been named after Harry Houdini. He’d gotten out of every pen Jamal had built so far, and he’d been found everywhere from the diner to the dressing rooms for the TV show they were filming nearby. Jamal had already had his fill of gathering up escaped piglets from the TV set—a baby goat was like putting lemon juice in the paper cut.

  The children who came to the petting zoo loved Billy, though, and Jamal couldn’t blame them. He was adorable, and he knew how to wrap people around his little finger . . . er, his little hoof. He’d butt right up against the fence and give a plaintive “baa,” and everyone would start digging through their pockets or purses for something they could feed him. Jamal had to keep an eye on that. Goats could digest anything, but that didn’t mean they should eat everything.

  “All right, Billy,” he said out loud as he walked around the side of the barn. “Let’s get you moved over to your new home.”

  The pen where he expected Billy to be, however, was empty.

  Jamal passed a hand down his face. Not again . . . He didn’t have time for this. A busload of daycare children was arriving in an hour, and he needed to make sure the puppies were taken from the barn and put in the play corral, and there was a new batch of kittens that needed to be tucked away from sight until they were older. Chasing down a baby goat—who was probably laughing his head off as he ran away—wasn’t on the schedule.

  “Jamal Jenkins, I need a word with you!”

  Jamal cringed as he turned around. He knew that voice—that very unhappy-sounding voice—and he knew that when the voice was unhappy, that meant everyone was about to be unhappy. “Hi, Jaclyn. How can I help you?”

  Jaclyn Hardy, River’s End Ranch’s unofficial matchmaker and fairy interpreter, stood in the clearing between the pens, her arms folded across her stomach. “I understand the nature of goats, and I know that young goats are more incorrigible than most. I also know how hard you work to keep all the fences in good repair. But Billy has just destroyed my vegetable garden. I have to plant an entire row of carrots now!”

  At least that answered the question of where the goat had gone. Jamal tried not to sound exasperated. “Don’t worry about it, Jaclyn—I’ll come over and take care of it this afternoon.”

  “Are you sure? I know you have a lot to do.”

  Yes, like training incorrigible goats to stay out of people’s gardens. “Not a problem. I’ll be there around four. As soon as the daycare group leaves.”

  She gave a nod. “Thank you. I brought him back and tied him up on the railing there. You’d better get him quick, though—he can chew through a rope in nothing flat.”

  As Jamal well knew. “Thanks, Jaclyn. And I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

  She nodded. “I know you will. You’re a good boy. It’s too bad your goat doesn’t take after you.”

  Billy didn’t look in the slightest bit repentant when Jamal untied him and walked him over to the new pen. He looked like a little goat who’d had far too much fun that afternoon and would be adding the day to his memoirs as soon as he figured out how to use a typewriter.

  Jamal fastened the latch, gave it another shake, and then squatted down to look at Billy through the bars. “Listen up, little guy,” he said. “You’ve got to stop this. One day, you might really get hurt. Not to mention all the time I’ve spent cleaning up after you.”

  Billy just looked at him.

  Jamal sighed. “Yeah, you’re cute. It’s a good thing you’ve got that going for you.” He stood up and walked back into the barn, ready to move some baby kittens and get ready for the daycare bus. He really couldn’t spend all day talking to a goat, even if he did figure that it would take nothing short of a several-hour lecture to get through the animal’s head.

  ***

  Kerry Holt glanced at her watch. “I know, Mom, but this is supposed to be good for me.” She tried not to roll her eyes. Even though this was a phone conversation and not face-to-face, Rue, her mother, would know if she was rolling her eyes. She had magic mom senses or something. “I’m sorry that I’m going to miss Uncle Fred’s birthday party, but I need to do something for myself just once.”

  She finished packing with one hand while she held the phone to her ear with the other hand, offering an “I know” every so often. Finally, she said, “Okay, Mom. I’ve got to go or I’ll miss my flight. Love you.”

  She hung up, paused, and then turned the volume on her phone off. She didn’t need to hear a long string of notifications or texts or anything else—she needed quiet. That’s why she was going to River’s End Ranch—to find quiet.

  Being the head of advertising at a large cosmetics company had been her dream job, and she’d fought hard for it. What she hadn’t realized, though, was the amount of stress actually getting that job would put on her, and her therapist had told her that if she didn’t take a couple of weeks off and go find some nature, she’d likely end up having a massive panic attack and being forced to take time off instead of doing it on her own terms. Kerry had agreed reluctantly. She had so much to do . . . but she knew her doctor was right. She had to chill out. No one could keep running at the pace she’d set for herself.

  She set her suitcases down by the front door, then took a minute to pull her long braids up into a bun and secure them with a scarf. She’d spent a lot of time in the stylist’s chair the day before having them done, and she wasn’t about to let them get messed up on the drive to the airport. Of course, putting the roof up on her convertible was out of the question. Why would you have a convertible in California just to put the roof up?

  She loaded up the car, then walked around her apartment one more time to make sure everything was off. Her best friend, Andie, would be coming by to check on everything, and she’d also be babysitting the convertible, but she wanted to be sure for herself that the oven was off and she hadn’t left anything plugged in. She wouldn’t be able to relax otherwise.

  She picked Andie up at ten thirty on the dot, and they drove to the airport with the radio cranked up. As they pulled into the drop-off zone and unloaded the suitcases, Andie said, “I’m so glad you took my advice. River’s End Ranch is just what you need—and don’t forget to hunt down my friend JJ. He’s a great guy.”

  “I don’t know if I want to hunt anyone down,” Kerry replied. “Maybe I’m better off just being alone.”

  “You might feel that way for a day or two, but friends are awesome things to have. I mean, look at me.” Andie threw her arms around Kerry and gave her a hug. “Have a great time, and seriously, try to relax. Rue’s got my number, and you know I’m going to check in on her a couple of times a day, no fail. You need this time for you.”

  Kerry nodded. “I’ll try.” She could just see her mother calling Andie four times an hour—and Andie, bless her sweet little blonde hea
d, bending over backwards for her so Kerry wouldn’t worry.

  She waved goodbye to her friend, who didn’t mind driving the convertible in the slightest, and went inside to check in and go through security. Once through, she bought a soda and sat down to wait for boarding, deciding to check her phone just one more time before powering it off for the flight. She had a text from Andie sent two minutes ago.

  Don’t hate me, but I just set you up for a blind date with JJ. He’ll be expecting you.

  What? Kerry stared at her phone, then blew out an exasperated breath. Andie’s heart was in the right place, but she needed to let Kerry fight her own battles sometimes, especially where men were concerned. Well, not that men were battles … except that sometimes they were. She sighed. She hadn’t been on a date in months. She hadn’t been in a relationship for over a year. Everything in her personal life had been shoved to the back burner as she chased down her career—a fact that drove her mother nuts because apparently, Kerry was supposed to have produced at least two chubby-cheeked grandbabies by now.

  And had been reminded of it often.

  For a split second, she wondered if her mother and Andie were in cahoots. Maybe Andie had been bribed to set up this blind date. This was starting to look suspicious … Andie had recommended River’s End Ranch, and that’s where her mysterious friend worked, and Andie was a sucker for her mom’s enchiladas ….

  The loudspeaker announced that boarding would soon begin. Kerry finished off her soda, tossed the cup in the garbage, and made sure she had her boarding pass handy. It was tempting not to go on this trip after all, but she’d already paid for it, and she did need the vacation. Maybe she could just stay in her room and forget that she was supposed to be going out with someone, and he’d forget he was supposed to be going out with someone, and then they could all be happy. That sounded like the best plan yet.

  Chapter Two

  Jamal chuckled and shook his head as he slid his phone back in his pocket. He’d gone to high school with Andie, and she was always trying to set people up and play matchmaker. Maybe she should be the one coming to the ranch instead of her friend—he’d introduce her to Jaclyn, and the two could exchange tips of the trade. He didn’t mind taking Andie’s friend out, but he hoped she didn’t expect them to fall madly in love. He’d never been a big believer in the whole blind date thing. He figured he knew how to spot the kind of woman he’d like to date.

  He could spot them, yes . . . and then what? He kicked at the gravel as he walked across the parking lot to meet the daycare bus. He couldn’t put his finger on what had gone wrong in the past—it seemed like every time he got close to popping the question, the girl he was dating decided that she needed to focus on her career or move across the country to care for her sister’s pet poodle or write a book. He laughed at himself. Okay, he was being melodramatic, but it was true—marriage just hadn’t been in the cards for him, and since he’d moved out here to the ranch, it seemed even further out of reach, as the guests came and went regularly and none had stuck around long enough to get to know. And it was even more frustrating when his friends seemed to be getting married right and left—soon, there wouldn’t be one unmarried person left on the whole property. Except him.

  He supposed that wouldn’t be so terrible except for one thing.

  He watched as a dozen three-and-four-year-olds tumbled out of the small bus. Their faces were filled with sheer excitement, and they each held a lunchbox clutched in their hands. Some of the little girls had pigtails that stood straight up in the air. A couple of the boys wore T-shirts with their favorite Marvel action heroes on them. One boy wore a Wonder Woman shirt. It made Jamal chuckle, but hey, why not?

  This was the main reason why he’d like to get married someday . . . he wanted kids.

  Sure, he could adopt—he knew of some agencies who worked with single parents. He’d been raised by a single mom, so he knew it could be done. However, as much as his mom had done for him, he had missed having a father in his life, and he wanted to make sure that his children were raised by both parents. And that meant marriage, and that meant finding a woman who wouldn't run away as soon as he suggested it.

  And the cycle just went on and on.

  In the meantime, his job at the ranch was perfect. Being in charge of the petting zoo, he spent his time with children and with animals, and he couldn’t think of anything else he’d rather do. He was surrounded by joy and innocence all day, and he wished everyone had that opportunity. How much better would the world be?

  The daycare teachers had the children line up in front of the bus, and Miss Patti, the director, turned to Jamal with a smile. He’d done six of these outings for her group since he’d come to the ranch, and she was right on top of things. Made his job easier.

  “Boys and girls, this is Jamal, and he takes care of the animals here on the ranch. He’s going to show us around today. Can you all tell him hello?”

  A dozen little voices clamored, “Hello, Jamal.” Some weren’t quite able to say his name, but that was all right. The fact that they tried warmed his heart.

  “Hi, everyone,” he said, stepping forward. “I’m so excited that you’re here. Are you ready to see some animals?”

  The children nodded, and one little boy in front piped up. “I heard that horses fart!”

  “If a horse farts on me, I’ll scream!” a little girl said.

  “Sometimes horses do fart, but that’s okay,” Jamal said, trying not to laugh. “Everything that’s alive has to fart sometimes.”

  “What about plants?” A boy to the left scowled. “My mom says plants are alive.”

  “That’s true, and you know what, I was wrong. Let’s say, everything that eats food has to fart sometimes.” Jamal realized as soon as he spoke that there was such a thing as plant food, and he hoped none of the childrens’ parents worked as a gardener or he’d be spending all day digging himself out of this mess. “Let’s get started, okay? First, we want your lunches to stay cool, so let’s put your boxes in this big cooler here on the porch.”

  The children tromped up and down the steps of the main house, dutifully disposing of their boxes as directed.

  “Nobody’s going to take my lunch, right?” A little girl with red braids stopped right in front of Jamal and put her hands on her hips.

  “Nobody,” Jamal promised. He glanced up and saw Wade Weston crossing the parking lot a few yards away. “Do you see that man? He’s probably the hungriest man here because he works so hard, but even he won’t steal your lunch.”

  She looked at Wade, then back at Jamal. Then she ran over to Wade and tugged on the hem of his shirt.

  “Mister! Mister!”

  Wade stopped walking and looked down, surprised. “Hi. How can I help you?”

  She pointed at Jamal. “He says you promise not to eat my food.”

  Wade looked at Jamal, who shrugged. “I definitely promise not to eat your food,” Wade said solemnly.

  “Okay.” With that, she skipped back to join the group, and Wade kept walking. Jamal grinned, glad his boss was so easygoing.

  “All right, let’s go see the animals. The first rule of the ranch is that we have to stay together.” Jamal picked up a bright red rope from the porch. “Everyone’s going to hold on to the rope any time we’re walking where cars are, okay? This is to help keep you safe.” He handed one end to Miss Patti, and he held the other end. The teachers helped the children line up, and then they began their awkward waddle-walk toward the barn.

  “Okay, we’re going to start with the piglets,” Jamal said. He opened the door to the first pen and allowed the children to go inside. “These little fellas are about a month old, and they weigh around fifteen pounds.”

  The piglets stepped through the hay to snuffle at the children’s shoes, which made them laugh. A few children held back, but the rest bent down to pet the animals, and one girl tried to pick one up under the armpits.

  “I don’t think the pig likes that, Chloe,” Miss Patti sa
id, but Chloe wasn’t about to be dissuaded.

  “He asked me to pick him up, Miss Patti,” she explained. “He grunted. See? That means, ‘Pick me up.’”

  “I see,” Miss Patti said, amusement on her face. “Jamal, is that what it means?”

  “I’ve never heard him talk, so I don’t know,” Jamal replied. “It’s okay to hold them, though, as long as no one’s rough.”

  As soon as Jamal said that, he wished he hadn’t. The children began to scramble for a piglet to hold, and as there were more children than there were piglets, a few had to share—one holding the head and front hooves, and the other holding the back end. Jamal hoped that their little conversation about farting animals earlier wouldn’t be proven correct just yet.

  After the piglets, they moved on to the rabbits—not Jaclyn’s rabbits, but some that had been brought in especially for this purpose. Then they saw the puppies and the sheep, and at last moved around to the goat pen.

  Which was empty.

  Jamal rubbed his forehead. Next attempt would be chicken wire. Maybe he should have used that from the beginning. “I’m sorry, everyone, but it looks like our little goat got loose, and you won’t be able to see him after all.”

  “Is that him?” one of the children asked, pointing, and Jamal turned to see Billy bounding off through the grass toward the river.

  “Yes, that’s him,” Jamal said.

  “Get him!”

  All twelve children immediately let go of the rope and took off after Billy, ignoring their teachers, who tried to call out to them and catch them. With so many yelling voices, of course a little goat would get scared, and Billy ran even faster. Jamal sprinted regularly when he worked out, but this was definitely pushing his limits.

  One by one, the children dropped out, panting, and Jamal passed them by. He didn’t know Billy was such an athlete. The little goat put on an extra burst of speed, taking Jamal right to the edge of the river.

  He turned to make sure none of the children had followed this far. Thankfully, they were all some distance back, now tired enough to listen to their teachers. Billy, on the other hand, had pranced out onto a fallen log that was dangling over the water.